December 16, 2004


There has been a person or persons recently who have been trying busily to inject viruses and parasitic nasties into my system in mails that reference this blog. And persistent? Goodness, I do believe that if I looked up the word 'Persistent" in the Webster Collegiate, this pest's picture would probably be there.

Well, even I have to admire such determination, but still I have but one thing to say to you: Give it up.

You're just not going to succeed in your mad little attempts to subvert my modest little blog. I have taken a few extreme precautions to guarantee that you won't. I am so confident in these measures, in fact, that I am going to divulge a few of these precautions to you now. You see, all mail to me, either through the comment feature of my blog or otherwise, is captured by off-shore servers in the hold of a decrepit freighter with Liberian registry, which in turn sends it to where it rigorously screened by a group of genetically enhanced middle school computer students living on base at a top secret military research facility at some desolate location in the Nevada Desert, Groom Lake I believe but no one will tell me exactly.

From there it is transmitted to Australia via a T-1 hidden in the rafters of a thatched hut on the beach in Tonga. In Australia, the data is converted from the traditional binary of 0's and 1's to O's and Z's and fired over to Bahrain. There it is converted back into traditional binary and transmitted to a hyper modified Commodore 64 on a table in the guestroom of an anonymous Estonian blogger.

After being rigorously subjected to no less than four state of the art anti-virus programs, then filtered through a top secret nuclear powered super computer in geo-synchronous orbit over Moscow, the signal is lasered to earth by bouncing the intense light beam back and forth between 13 different communications satellites and finally down to the servers at the NIH, which in turn uploads them into the Yahoo servers where they are promptly delivered to my mailbox.

So give it up.

Posted by Mamamontezz at December 16, 2004 11:04 PM

Now thats funny!!

SlagleRock Out!

Posted by: SlagleRock at December 16, 2004 11:32 PM

hehe this made me laugh out loud.

Posted by: emma at December 18, 2004 11:38 AM

The battery-powered lizards down in Decoding are miffed that you didn't mention them. But that's par for the course in the declassified version you gave here.

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