November 14, 2004
Breaking News
Idiotarians Stripped of Medal
ESPN
Today, in the 14th Annual Idiotarian Game being held in Worcester, MA, Maude Frumeweiser and her partner Chip Wigglesworth were disqualified and their medals taken from them after a post-race urine test failed to indicate any presence of drugs.
"It is a widely embraced tradition in the Idiotarian subculture that hallucinogenic and mood altering herbs are a vital part of games participation," stated Moonbeam Dragonfly Jones, current president of the International Idiotarian Games Committee. "We take it very seriously, and when, like, some Just-Say-No Fascist tries to take part in the games, it like totally makes a mockery of the spirit of Idiotarianism."
"It was so totally bogus of these people to think they could get away with it."
When asked for comment, Chip Wigglesworth stated "I completely fail to understand the attitude here. I'm just a qualified as any of these other people. Sure, I don't drop acid or fire up a fatty after work or during my lunch hour, but sheesh, some of us are just natural Idiotarians."
"I mean, I voted for Kerry," he continued. "I read the Washington Post. I work as a door-to-door community political activist. Hell, I even helped make Molotov cocktails for ELF last summer during a PETA sensitivity camp. That should count for something."
Because of the disqualification, the Moonbat Medal was given to the second place team, Roxie "cb" Meadowlark-Jones and Sophia Soppleworth of the Vassar Rainbow team.
Boy do they know how to party or what?
Thats hysterical Mama.
Cheers from a Flu ridden LC
What a party, that's why you get drunk, so you don't remember what you've done.
Posted by: Jack at November 15, 2004 06:06 PMThat guy has issues. He certainly isn't playing the game right. Or is he?
Posted by: Velociman at November 15, 2004 07:16 PMUm, drink warning next time please.
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