Mamamontezz's Mental Rumpus Room

Tin-foil Hat Time

Okay, I admit it. In the back of my closet, behind the pair of ugly shoes and the box of old ballcards and comic books, lies a smaller, inconspicuous box. Its drab and nondescript appearance give no clue to the terror that lurks within. Yes, inside this innocuous little carton is, dare I say it, a tin-foil hat.

Sure, sure, laugh at me if you will if it makes you feel better about your own secreted tin-foil hat. Scoff, if you must. But naming my demons takes away their powers, and such is also true of my Alcoa headgear.

Why, you might ask, do I even admit to having one, much less discuss it openly?

Well, because today I actually found myself considering putting it on. Yes, I read something yesterday, followed by a related story today, that stirred up that whole grassy knoll, black helicopter, LSD in the resevoir, Michigan Militia are massing at the Indiana state line, aliens stole my DNA line of thinking that both shames and excites me at equivalent levels.

Yesterday, while entering a building at the summit for Asia-Pacific leaders, Chilean security personnel refused to allow Secret Service agents to enter the dinner, causing a fracas, and necessitating the physical intervention of The Most Powerful Leader in the World (take that, Chiraq) to pull his head of security through the melee and into the building.

My co-worker and I were discussing the incident this morning, very early this morning, as we attempted to clear the cobwebs with copious cafinated infusions. "Makes a person wonder," I said to her, "if there wasn't something going on there and the Chilean Security people didn't want the Secret Service agents there to stop it from happening."

I mean, you hear about the corruption within the militaries of South and Central America all the time, and how easy it would be to infiltrate a group if you really wanted to get someone. It's not like we operate in a vacuum and don't see news about this coup here, or that assasination attempt there.

And then, just when I had moved on to another topic, I find another article about Yet Another security FUBAR at the same summit.

SANTIAGO, Chile (AP) - Hours after President Bush dove into a fracas to rescue his lead Secret Service agent from a confrontation with Chilean security officials, word surfaced of another security dispute. This time, an elaborate state dinner Sunday night was the casualty.

The dinner planned for Bush and 200 others by Chilean President Ricardo Lagos was reportedly scrapped after Chile was unwilling to accept security measures sought by the U.S. Secret Service, including a demand that all guests pass through metal detectors.

Is it just me, or does anyone else see where I'm going here? Are those black helicopters I hear in the distance, or does anyone else see a problem with the goings on at the Chilean Summit?

My ears are buzzing and I think I can hear the transmitter in my head. I need to get home and retrieve my tin-foil hat from the back of the closet. It looks as though I may have become a potential candidate for membership that as yet undeveloped forum, RepublicanUnderground. To borrow Elizabeth's term at Poisoning Pigeons, I am starting to sound like a Screaming Squirrel.

Posted by Mamamontezz at November 21, 2004 11:45 AM