Mamamontezz's Mental Rumpus Room

Joke of the day

Marty wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his
eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water
on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all
clean and pressed. Marty looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect
order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and
notices a note on the table

"Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love you."

So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the
morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Marty asks, "Son, what
happened last night?" His son says, "Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk
and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a
black eye when you stumbled into the door." Confused, Marty asks, "So, why is
everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for
me?" His son replies, "Oh that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you said, "Lady, leave me alone, I'm married!"

A self-induced hangover - $100.00
Broken furniture - $200.00
Breakfast - $10.00
Saying the right thing - priceless